Greetings Idol Fans!

Our Idol kids keep dwindling in numbers and here we are at the final 4.  Who knew crushing peoples dreams would be so dang fun!?!?

We start the show, of course, with the group number “Bringing In The Eaves.” OK, so I don’t know what eaves are, but I know this is so lame. 4 people don’t make for a really super engaging ensemble. Let’s face it, The Spice Girls (post Ginger) they ain’t.

Ryan does his boring recap that fills up about 5 minutes.  Honestly, they should just read IdolBlather on air. 

On to the Results.

David Archuleta
You again broke out the pleather members only jacket for this momentous occasion. Maybe some day you can afford the real leather one… you’re safe.

Filler time! Idol sent the kids to Vegas for a little fun and lots of promotional appearances. They got a private plane and a fan fair as they went to see Cirque du Soleil. All you need is love… and some really good sponsors.

David Cook
I wonder just how much effort goes into looking that dirty. I have another week to ponder, you’re safe.

So we’re left with Jason Castro & Syesha Mercado.  But hey we have another like 40 minutes of show to fill, so lets extend their suffering.

Dang!  They sneak it in on me every week!!  Just when I’ve gotten past the first commercial break and I’ve just about forgotten, there it is.  That Ford commercial.  This week the Idolettes are Matadors in a creepy “Ring Of Fire” cover.  I’m sorry but there is no frickin’ way 20 something Idols should be singing Johnny Cash to a bunch of 14 year olds.  The cosmos is seriously unaligned right now.

Well he couldn’t keep a record contract, but Taylor Hicks gets his own postal stamp.  I suppose having your face stuck on a thousand cable bills and birthday cards is almost as good as selling millions of albums.  <AHEM>

Time wasting Q&A. David Cook gets a date in Pittsburgh. Jason has to overcome a dead brain, Syesha gets reminded that she’s the only girl, Simon wants to get knighted and be the next James Bond. Riveting…. really…
The special guest Maroon 5 takes the stage. That guy’s voice is so high, I swear he’s still waiting for the left one to drop. Maybe the pants are too tight and contorting his junk in weird ways.

Bo Bice is back to sing a new song that I think is called “Witness” (he says it like 37,ooo times.) About half way through I realized that I was having a conversation over it which means it was less than engaging.  It’s only when he broke out the talk box when I snapped out of my indifference with a emphatic…. What the *&#$!!!???!  Does Peter Frampton know this dude stole his shtick?” I know he’s being all true to himself, but the whole southern rock thing is so 30 years ago.

Thankfully, I think we are officially out of filler materials so we’re on to the final results.

Syesha and Jason are back center stage. Ryan rambles through their recaps from last night. The kids ramble a bit and Ryan lets the Idol Axe fall. And Jason is leaving us tonight! Oh thank the Idol gods!

So long Jason!  Your big blue eyes and ratty hair have run it’s course on this Idol stage.  But worry not, our idiot toker friend.  For if this music thing doesn’t work out for you, you can always get a job as a brushless carwash.  Besides, who knows!  Hackie Sacks may become an extreme sport in the Olympics.

Peace, Love & A Really Good Conditioner,

Kristi

Greetings Idol Fans!

Unfortunately due to copyright infringement issues, there will be no IdolBlather recap this week….
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APRIL FOOLS!!!!!  Hey if Ryan can do it why can’t I?? 

ON TO THE SHOW!

Tonight’s Idol mentor is Dolly Parton.  The buxom “Backwoods Barbie” gives the kids lots of encouragement and lifetime passes to Dollywood.  Yee Haw Everybody.
Brooke

Our resident folk girl sings”Jolene” about a girl begging another not to take her man.  It wasn’t the best, but I think it was enough for Brooke to keep the man and her fans. I just have one fashion comment for her… Please please please, eat a sandwich!  She looked so thin I think the buttons on her pants were hanging on to her hip bones for dear life!

David C

Ooo, they did his hair better this week!  I think there might be some extensions in there.  It actually looks thicker.  Speaking of thick, he lays the rocker thing on thick for his cover of”Little Sparrow” with acoustic guitar.  Who knew you could take the twang out of Dolly’s hillbilly best?  He rocked it yet again this week.  I think the new ‘do is helping his “IT” quotient.

Ramiele

The tiny little pixie doll  attempts “Do I Ever Cross Your Mind” and shows how completely out of her element she is with the Dolly classic.  She kept it country but unfortunately also kept it Karaoke.  Definitely not going to be crossing anyone’s mind in the votes. I think you can tell the pressure of keeping up with the semi-pros is taking it’s toll.

Jason

The Rasta boy has a stalker chick in Colorado who sends multiple postcards at once.  Sweet.  With his rendition of “Traveling  Man” he yet again reminds me of a hacky sacks, hemp beads and bong water.  But at least this week, he picks up the tempo and the performance.

Carly

Ye Irish Lass  covers “Here You Come Again”  sans the 80’s pop country back beat and place in LiteFM playlist history.  She slows it down to a soulful pace and proves why she had a record deal  in the first place. Oh that’s right,no wonder she sounds so pro… she already was. But I’m not bitter…:D

David A

The baby hobbit covers “Smokey Mountain Miracles.”  OK honestly, does kid know at least ONE up-tempo song?  He is so sappy that if you stuck a tube up his butt, you’d get Maple Syrup.

Kristy

Could she having stepped in it any more?  Country week with Dolly Parton… this girl should be thanking the Idol Gods… or Idol Idols?  Either way, the whole freakin’ song was in her lower register and completely lacked personality and then she suddenly shoves the ending up into her “Big Finish.” The whole thing totally felt disconnected.  She needs to find her shoes and go home to the horse farm.

Syesha

As the only representative of R&B she of course had to pick “I Will Always Love You” by Dolly come Whitney.   Did anyone else get annoyed with the “propped up on the piano, staring into the camera” incessantly crap?  She does her best and shows off her pipes, but unfortunately the comparison to the original might be too much to overcome.

Michael

Ok the dude is wearing an ascot… or in his case, could it be an as(s)cot?  Hee Hee.  He goes all Joe Cocker gospel on “It’s All Wrong, But It’s Alright” and made us all say Amen.  He can leave his hat on.. he’s getting through another week with that.

So that’s our Top 9.  So which Idols will America always love, and who will be saying goodbye to stardom and back to 9 to 5?

Tune in tomorrow to find out!

Peace, Love and Pickin’,
Kristi

Greetings Idol Fans!

Shake your groove thing people, it’s 70’s night for the ladies. Yep, it’s one more night of the polyester decade. We’ll do our best to stay away from the Disco, just in case they whip out “Disco Night” later in the competition. And lets face it… the longer we hold out for funkytown music in the season, the kookier and drunker Paula will dance.

Carly Smithson likes her tats, putting little shamrocks in the foam in her Guinness at her Irish pub job, and being Suzy Homemaker. She could also be a long lost sister of Nancy and Ann Wilson. She belts out the Heart song “Crazy on You” and proves what it means to be a professional amateur. Hey I’m just glad she finally got rid of that frickin’ yellow eyeshadow.

Syesha Mercado likes her acting career and her baby cry impersonation. So that’s good, if this whole music thing doesn’t work out, she’s got a career as a diaper voiceover. She attempts to be sultry on “Me and Mrs, er Mr. Jones.” The original song implies something steamy and exciting but her version wasn’t very steamy… just sort of damp.

Brooke White likes to do hair. In fact, she used to be in Beauty School. Which is ironically perfect since her reel leads in to her cover of Carly Simon’s “You’re So Vain.” She was folky, funky, and every week coming more and more out of her shell. No Frankie Avalon “Beauty School Drop Out” needed here.

Remiele Malubay likes to hula and shake her Polynesian groove thang. She does on her cover of Evelyn Champagne King’s “Don’t Leave Me This Way.” Unfortunately, this just come across as a 2AM karaoke round. I don’t think anyone will be leaving this little Rock-a-Hula Baby anytime soon but she needs to step it up next week.

Kristy Lee Cook likes being a tomboy and willingly shows herself in a full-on camo jumpsuit. Ok, there’s s difference between All American and All American Uni-bomber. Anyway, she squat-rocks her way through “You’re No Good” by Linda Ronstadt. Unfortunately, I don’t think she’s as good as she thinks she is.

Amanda Overmyer likes to read. She a kooky mix of juxtapositions, no? Rocker that read, Nurse that rides a Harley. Ain’t America grand!?!? I do not know what is up with her look tonight. Her hair looks like a cross between Rogue from X-Men and Lion-O from Thundercats. She looks very uncomfortable as she takes the stage with the Kansas hit “Carry On My Wayward Son.” Unfortunately, the song is even more all over the place then her look.

Alaina Whitaker doesn’t like her food to touch on her plates. Yet another riveting facet to her 2 dimensional personality. Sporting her best Carrie Underwood look-a-like hair, make-up and outfit she yells her best rendition of “Hopelessly Devoted” by Olivia Newton John. Unfortunately she forgot one important piece to her Carrie ensemb’… talent.

Alexandrea Lushington loves her local fire department. We all should. Firefighters are awesome. Mad props to America’s bravest. ALush covers Chicago’s “If You Leave Me Now” with a palpable awkardness. It’s almost as if the song was handed to her to sing. I’m sorry, is she competing on a national singing show or getting ready to hike through Yellowstone? The whole outfit screamed LL Bean Spring/Summer Catalog.

Kady Malloy likes to sing Britney, Cher and… opera? She’s a Soprano… and not the HBO kind. Notfanuttin, She covers Heart’s “Magic Man” but it sort of get stuck in her throat. I think the notes got caught in there with her personality. Someone needs to make sure this girl has a pulse.

Asia’h Epperson likes her pompoms. No not those pom-poms. She actually like to cheer. I bet she actually has used the term “Cheerocracy.” Ok so I figured it would come out somewhere, but I called it on guys night… “All By Myself” by Eric Carmen. Yep, it’s here but better yet.. it’s the Celine Dion version. But Asia’h gives it all she’s got and pulls out a performance worth of a Rah-Rah-Rah.

I think we’ll see Amanda and Alexandrea swansongs tomorrow night, but Alaina or Kady may see themselves the recipients of low vote counts.

Well that’s another decade and another week of performance down. We got rockafied, funkafied, folkafied and thankfully we made with through, eardrums intact.

Tune in to see who goes home tomorrow night!!

Peace, Love & AM Gold,
Kristi

Greetings Idols Fans!

Break out the Bell bottoms and polyester suits people, it’s 70’s night!!! Whoop Whoop!! Ok maybe I need to ease up on the ABBA a bit. Anyhoo, the guys are up first again this week with their choice of songs from the 70’s. Oh but before they sing, we have to watch a reel and learn a little bit about the fellas. Whoop whoop, indeed.

Michael Johns likes tennis and likes wearing the sporty headband that goes with it. He gravels through “You Can Go Your Own Way” but I thought his way was a little dull tonight. Great song, bad cover.

Jason Castro hates interviews and proves it by screwing up forty million times.  He strums out “I Just Want To Be Your Everything” by the Bee Gees sans the sugary falsetto but with a big sweet helping of some funny folky sensitive guitar boy.

Luke Menard likes his a cappella group…probably because they let him sing solos. He undertakes a nasally cover of the Queen song, “Killer Queen.” But if you ask me he’s a Queen killer as he just slaughtered that song.

Robbie Carrico likes to drag race and smell gas. Classy. Oh, and he races in a crappy hatchback with one headlight. double classy. He pseudo-rocks “Hot Blooded” by Foreigner. He is trying so hard to be rocker and just left me cool. By the way, I’m so glad he thinks enough of this opportunity to forgo the shower and wear his pajama shirt on stage.

Danny Noriega liked his 9th grade punk band so much that he chose a 70 ballad for tonight’s show. Lucky us. He channels his inner Karen Carpenter on “Superstar.”  He’s over the top camp.  But I’m totally thankful he didn’t bust out with “All By Myself” by Eric Carmen, because then I would have poked my own eardrums out.

David Hernandez liked to do cartwheels when he did gymnastics as a kid. Now he’s more concerned with vocal acrobatics on “Papa Was A Rolling Stone” and nails the landing. The judges give him 10s.

Jason Yeagers likes to teach himself to play instruments and do home hair highlights. He pulss out the Doobie Brothers “Long Train Runnin” for his nightly lounge act. He’s like Ricky Martin but without the salsa hip moves, the sex appeal, the stage presence or the charisma. Ok, so he’s nothing like Ricky Martin. He tries to be hip and cool, but just comes off as Holiday Inn cheese.

Chikezie likes his Nigerian name and heritage. I like it too. I like his performance too of “I Believe” by Donny Hathaway. The vocals where hot… but does anyone else think he looks like Carlton from Fresh Prince?

David Cook likes words. So much that he is a self proclaimed “word nerd.” Bet that brings the ladies flocking. Maybe not but the cover of “All Right Now” by Free should amass a few of the fairer sex. Girls love a guy with a guitar don’t we? Probably the best of the night.

David Archuletta likes his impromptu audition for Kelly Clarkson and the rest of the Season 1 kids back in 2001. He should also like his performance tonight because everybody else does. I love his little pleather jacket. He looks like a little Bratz doll. You know I really want to like this guy, but I am having a really tough time getting over the big daddy pimping the judges seem to do for him.

All in all, the boys left the jitters in the green, er, red room and really brought their B+ game. I have to say, Luke and Jason are my picks for packing it up this week. But what do I know… I’ve underestimated the PowerDialers before.

Tune in tomorrow night as our journey through the 70’s continues with the girls!!

Peace, Love & Platforms,
Kristi

Oh yes it’s Ladies Night and the feelins’ right, oh what a night…

Oh wait wrong decade, it’s 60’s night… anyhoo, it’s still ladies night and it’s still the most talented American Idol ever. (Because Ryan says so, that’s how I know.)

There’s a bug running amok in the Girls hotel rooms. It seems a lot of the girls are battling colds, flus, and bronchitis.. I’m sure some are, but I wonder how many will use it as a crutch after a crappy performance.

Kristy Lee Cook

Once upon a time this little horse trainer had a record deal with Arista records, and once upon a time a little bit later, they dropped her. But good thing Idol found her to give her a second chance at being discovered. Maybe this 2nd chance is what made her think that an underwhelming karaoke performance of “Rescue Me” would be enough to get her through. She blames it on brochitis. I blame it on bad song choice.

Joanne Borgella

She’s the big gorgeous girl with the big gorgeous voice. She takes on “Say A Little Prayer” I think the bug got the best of her. There’s no amount of prayer that’s going to save this performance. She’s good, I just hope America remember how good she is.

Alaina Whitaker

She comes across as confident, almost over self assured… but the minute she opens her mouth, her IQ shines almost as brightly as the Crest Whitestrip smile she’s sports and doesn’t last nearly as long. She’s a Carrie Underwood wannabe with a touch of Carmen Rasmussen from Season 3. She sort of belted her way through the song and the judges buy it. I think she just temporarily deafened them.

Amanda Overmeyer

She’s an awesome gritty singer who evidently was another victim of a drive by dye job. But this one works. She’s freakin’ Leather Tuscadero reincarnated. She blows “Baby Please Don’t Go” out of the water and makes the Pop idols quiver in their Doc Marten knockoffs. I hope America begs her not to go just yet… Idol could use a little edge from time to time.

Amy Davis

The model takes the stage with “Where the Boys Are.” I think she should be more concerned with where the notes are. I don’t think she hit very many of them. Randy calls it “scooping” which reminds me… I need to clean the kitty litter. Anyway, sure, she’s cute, but unlike her pretty modeling pictures she actually has to sound good here.

Brooke White

The good girl who shares some similarities to Carly Simon and Joanne Mitchell is the second Idolette to tackle “Happy Together” by the Turtles. Unlike a turtle this girl came right out of her shell. She was like a happy little sprite skipping around the stage and (I can’t believe I’m going to say this) it worked.

Alexandrea Lushington

She’s best known for her great grandmom who hung with Ryan while Alex was auditioning. She didn’t get much camera time during Hollywood week, but she certainly made up for it this week. She was all over the camera and it loved it. She threw her own “Blood, Sweat & Tears ” into “Spinning Wheel” and wowed the audience (except for Simon, but he’s PMSing anyway.)

Kady Malloy

The blonde Britney Spears impersonating cutie gives some homage to the 60’s and Phil Collins with “Groovy Kind Of Love.” I think the song sort of swallowed her and her personality. Well I take that back… she would actually have to get a personality first to have it swallowed up by a song.

Asia’h Epperson

If scientists found a way to splice together the genes of Gladys Knight, Mary J Blige and and Rita Moreno, Asia’h would be the result. She’s a spicy little R&B rocker girl with a raspy vocal and the sparkle in her eye of angel vs. devil. She’s does a fun rendition of “Take Another Piece Of My Heart” and surprises everyone.

Remiele Malubay

She’s a tiny tiny girl with a giant giant voice. She’s so tiny, she makes Ryan look tall. She’s got a great look, a great sound, and a great rendition of “You Don’t Have To Say You Love Me.” After tonight, I think a lot of people will openly admit to loving her.

Syesha Mercado

Ok did it bother anyone else, that she kept talking into the camera during her interview!?!?!? Ok I’m over it. Did you hear her version of “Tobacco Road”? Holy crap does the does the pretty girl with the fro have pipes or what? Can I ask any more questions??

Carly Smithson

As we’ve talked about before, she was signed by a record label and had a CD released at 17, and she admitted it on her video reel. Surprisingly, somehow she can still participate on this show. Anyway, the tatted Irish lass takes the night’s theme to heart and pulls out a great retro look(she got rid of the yellow eye-shadow,) song (Tony Bennett’s Shadow Of Your Smile,) and sound(But what do you expect from a “pro-am.” )

So Ladies Night is over. Who won our love, who won a ticket back to anonymity? My picks for the 2 girlies heading home are Amy Davis and Kady Malloy. The girls are pretty and no doubt talented to get this far. I’m just not sure they did enough to make any further. Of course, maybe the “ringer” fact will keep them both in, and I’ll be a complete moron. Hey, but that’s show business!!

Tune in tomorrow night for results!!

Peace, Love & Vocal Scooping

Greeting Idol Fans -

Knowing how much we all love those wacky auditions, the minds of American Idol would not let us live with just seven episodes. No, they mustered all the footage they could from the hours and hours they had, to bring us and the paying advertisers just one more audition show. This time it’s a “Best Of.” We go the way of many a TV series and reminisce about the ups, the downs, the funny, the sad… thankfully, all with out the use of a single flashback…

Best Moments

Cardin McKinney
She’s a fondue restaurant waitress but there’s no cheese here. She blasts “One Night Only” and proves she could be a Dream Girl.

Joanne Borgella
Joanna is a lovely plus sized model who’s performed the national anthem at MSG. She’s got the pipes to shake the rafters there. But it’s no surprise. She’s been identified by Vote For The Worst as a “plant.” Still she’s likable and talented so we should see her make the the top 24.

Chikezie Eze
Nice guy who tried out last year and didn’t make it. He said Randy wasn’t “feelin’ him.” Well he should be feeling him now. The guy’s got major pipes.

The Reason We Really Watch Moments

Tiffany Campbell
Tiffany says her voice is a gift from God. Oh Good Lord, please take it back.

Ashley Lawing
Pretty little southern girl who has obviously perfected the art of using her looks. She sings a Kellie Pickler song and it becomes painfully obvious that there is no amount of lipgloss that can make her talented.

Alicia Stelzel
She’s an easy-going dimwitted blonde who shrieks through a song. Simon haters her, but Randy and Paula tell her to go learn a Dolly Parton song. The girl gullibly complies and learns “Islands In The Stream.” She warbles through it sort of dumbfounded, as am I since she makes it through.

Well we’re through phase 1 of our quest for Idoldom. We’re on to Hollywood next week for the grueling group work, the late nights, and the One Tree Hill like story lines.

Peace, Love & Good Highlights Reels,
Kristi

It looks like Paula is out to be “Forever Your Girl.” She’s just recorded a new dance song and it’s hitting the airwaves in LA already. The single “Dance Like There’s No Tomorrow” can be found on Randy Jackson’s new CD, “Randy Jackson’s Music Club, Volume 1” which features an impressive ensemble of musicians. Paula’s track already has a video that will be premiered during the Super Bowl this Sunday. Oh and just in case you need a fix of good old 90’s pop, Paula also has a Greatest Hits album that was released last May. You can pick up Paula Abdul Greatest Hits: Straight Up! here